Does it Really Get Better?

So last time I left you with this video and I am overwhelmed by the number of comments you guys left. It really gave me nothing a lot to think about.

But anywho, as promised, I want to discuss this video a little more and show how while I'm sure it was made with the best intentions, doesn't really inspire hope so much as despair.

                              

The fundamental issue being that while Mormons individually can make the choice to accept their family members, colleagues, friends that are gay…the Church hasn't changed its tune.

How can it get better if there is no change in official doctrine?

The only reason gays received such negative public opinions from the Mormon community in the first place was because of the Church's teachings.

Now that public opinion has changed this can only go so far.

I want to point your attention to a few places in this video to show what I think their problems are, how they could help themselves gain more respect in the gay community, and most importantly actually help people dealing with these difficult situations:

1. "You don't know me, but I think I know you"

No…you don't. Just because you have a son that's gay doesn't mean you know all the gay people on the planet (there are quite a few of us). Advice: stick to your situation, why isn't that good enough? I think sharing this story is brave and may be inspirational to people out there, but that is for them to decide. Your son can't speak for all of us and you cannot speak for all the parents out there.

2. "My son was such a perfect child"

Now this is just unfortunate on so many levels. This woman comes off as insensitive and alienates the audience. They need to be careful if they actually want to communicate a message of hope, this was not the way to go.

3. "I don't know what it feels like to be gay…I'm straight"

Why is this even in here?! With all these interviews they chose this clip?! This quote has been taken out of context and does nothing to support the overall objective: to make people feel better. This is supposed to be about the people who are going through tough times, how is him being straight helpful? Remember I am the focus (as usual), the audience, me…over here!!!

4. "I grew up where people told me that being gay was wrong and it was a sin"

This will be quick…it's still a sin according to the official organized Mormon Church. Notice how they cut there, mid-thought just when we were waiting to hear that she was no longer told that, but nothing has changed.

5. "I told a coworker if a gay ever came onto me I'd punch him. Now you know what I would do? I'd probably hug him."

Would you really?! If a girl came up to me I would probably say something to the effect of, "I don't play for your team, sorry, move on!" If you're not into it, it's ok to politely decline. None of this oversympathizing (yes I made up a word) we don't need special attention, we need to be treated like normal human beings. Thanks for trying, next!

6. "Society is moving in your direction"

Yes we know and we so appreciate your attempts to catch up, but you're a little late (Prop 8 ring any bells?). We know society is becoming more receptive and understanding of our community, but that isn't the fundamental issue here. There were people who accepted gays before this video, the problem is that people who are both Mormon and gay are still considered to be living in sin if they pursue any kind of same-sex relationship. That is the source of all the pain and anger among this demographic.

The Church needs to step in, not the members, to embrace these youth who are struggling and hurting. Tell them It Gets Better cause until the Church changes their religious doctrine they are condemning gays to a lifetime of loneliness or a lifetime of lies and deceit.